Cats have feelings too. <3
There's just something about this day that got me into thinking.
I think I'm beginning to understand the true meaning of a paradox - you know, two very opposite things that happen at the same time. [And I'm not talking Theological terms here. More on the lighter, shallower and trivial stuff.]
For the past few days I could never be more thankful with the way my life is setup even if the atmosphere can be quite demanding. Aside from constantly trying to keep up with the jobs on routine and stuff to attend to here and there, I also have to squeeze all the patience, optimism and strength that I have in every inch of my body just so I can put a closure to every day that passes. Life is gonna be more than rock hard if I don't suck it up.
Which now brings me to the point which I want to underscore. In spite of how everything is seemingly given and laid out in front of me, is there anything in this world that I could possibly want?
Answer: Our current topic in our Theo class is none other than L.O.V.E.
According to Sir Asis' lecture, we all undergo three stages of what we think may be love, when in fact it's not.
1. Falling in love
2. Disillusionment
3. Falling out of love
And then, that's when true love begins - because real love is when you have fallen out of love but still chooses to love in the end. See, love is not a feeling it is a choice. For if it were a feeling, then we won't be able to love those who are difficult to love.
Oh such words of wisdom coming from a Theology class.
Funny though because I've never felt so completely alone in my entire life without having any qualms about it. I'm practically surrounded with everyone I love yet I don't exactly have the person I want to love right beside me (he's busy cavorting with other girls and uhhh). And I'm not actually bitter or spiteful upon seeing love birds diffused almost everywhere; they're actually nice to look at. But as much as possible I try to veer away from tensions I can easily sense from friends: you know, two people about to develop that stage of liking one another and couples who just want to spend their quality time together. In short, no more 3rd wheeling for me. HAHA.
And then I sat beside the window late this afternoon while the rain was pouring and the perfect view of the football field was beginning to be clouded by the mist forming outside. It was a bit damp and cold, nothing but a cup of coffee and a pile of books under a warm bed to complete my reverie. But anyway, I sure could have wallowed at the fact that nobody was there to hug me then and there yet I didn't. I was just breathing the air and appreciating the perfect ambiance to study. Having the leisure to work on my own time and pace has given me this certain kind of comfort, the kind that leaves me positively longing for something worth looking forward to.
Perhaps I've been busy getting so emotionally attached and being disillusioned to different kinds of people for the last decade that I've never been able to enjoy this feeling of liberation, of actually being me and of being mature enough to handle the situation.
After all,
I think I'm beginning to understand the true meaning of a paradox - you know, two very opposite things that happen at the same time. [And I'm not talking Theological terms here. More on the lighter, shallower and trivial stuff.]
For the past few days I could never be more thankful with the way my life is setup even if the atmosphere can be quite demanding. Aside from constantly trying to keep up with the jobs on routine and stuff to attend to here and there, I also have to squeeze all the patience, optimism and strength that I have in every inch of my body just so I can put a closure to every day that passes. Life is gonna be more than rock hard if I don't suck it up.
Which now brings me to the point which I want to underscore. In spite of how everything is seemingly given and laid out in front of me, is there anything in this world that I could possibly want?
Answer: Our current topic in our Theo class is none other than L.O.V.E.
According to Sir Asis' lecture, we all undergo three stages of what we think may be love, when in fact it's not.
1. Falling in love
2. Disillusionment
3. Falling out of love
And then, that's when true love begins - because real love is when you have fallen out of love but still chooses to love in the end. See, love is not a feeling it is a choice. For if it were a feeling, then we won't be able to love those who are difficult to love.
Oh such words of wisdom coming from a Theology class.
Funny though because I've never felt so completely alone in my entire life without having any qualms about it. I'm practically surrounded with everyone I love yet I don't exactly have the person I want to love right beside me (he's busy cavorting with other girls and uhhh). And I'm not actually bitter or spiteful upon seeing love birds diffused almost everywhere; they're actually nice to look at. But as much as possible I try to veer away from tensions I can easily sense from friends: you know, two people about to develop that stage of liking one another and couples who just want to spend their quality time together. In short, no more 3rd wheeling for me. HAHA.
And then I sat beside the window late this afternoon while the rain was pouring and the perfect view of the football field was beginning to be clouded by the mist forming outside. It was a bit damp and cold, nothing but a cup of coffee and a pile of books under a warm bed to complete my reverie. But anyway, I sure could have wallowed at the fact that nobody was there to hug me then and there yet I didn't. I was just breathing the air and appreciating the perfect ambiance to study. Having the leisure to work on my own time and pace has given me this certain kind of comfort, the kind that leaves me positively longing for something worth looking forward to.
Perhaps I've been busy getting so emotionally attached and being disillusioned to different kinds of people for the last decade that I've never been able to enjoy this feeling of liberation, of actually being me and of being mature enough to handle the situation.
After all,
The best love is the kind
that awakens the soul;
that makes us reach for more,
that plants the fire in our hearts
and brings peace to our minds.
- Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook
that awakens the soul;
that makes us reach for more,
that plants the fire in our hearts
and brings peace to our minds.
- Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook
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