Break time. -- this is for you.

Wooohoo! Math long test later.ü I think I've studied pretty much everything that's bound to come out in the LT later. Haha. Goodluck.

How do you fall out of love for someone?

'You cannot love and hold yourself back from its full force; love is about placing that bet, taking that risk and letting go of fear. Love is dangerous, for it will always ask you to jump to the chasm with your eyes closed, with nothing but trust to break your fall.'

I was once happy with him. That once was almost always. Looking back, I'd see how far I've gone through and how strong I've emerged in the trials I have come face to face with. The promise of forever was quintessential then. We were both clinging to it, putting every ounce of effort into making it work and just trying to make ourselves happy in the process. We were both looking foward to the life that we have planned to live together, forever.

But what happened? After all these months you seemed to have just changed your mind. You have been reinstating the issue of getting tired of the relationship routine but then those attempts were so futile. After an hour or so, you go back to your old self again. The sweet, charming, caring, loving and understanding guy who has offered me his heart and hand to forever's oblivion. So again, what happened?

I keep on questioning myself even if by doing so, I know my quest for answers is in vain. But can you give me what I want? Are you still willing to pursue this wholeheartedly? Or are you sticking to your words? Because in case you haven't noticed, I have been sacrificing everything just for us to be what we still are. (Or maybe what we were used to, I might be mistaken) If you truthfully said that you love or love-d me, can you just make that your basis into leaving me an explanation as to how you are treating me now? It's the least thing you can do after leaving my heart scathed, scarred, battered, worn-out. Sorry.

I don't know. Thoughts have been spurring from my mind. Maybe I should give in. Or not. My heart tells me that I can't but there's a part of me which is trying hard to let go. There is no use in fooling myself that you'd go back to your old self if something really did happen. Unless of course, you'd care to explain that. Please?

What happened to us? I would want to believe that everything was real. That even if we had our own share of problems and misdeeds, we were able to go through them. Does this justify my assertion of this being just a phase? Or is it really the end? I can't struggle on this by my own. That's why there's the two of us in this relationship.

It's a fact that can't be ignored. We were happy. We were crazy about each other. That's why we're still here in the first place. But should we stop?=c

I love you.='c I love you so much. Did you really mean it when you told me that too?

Why is it so easy for you to let this go? Why are you telling me that you still need me all the same? You just want me to give you breathing space and all that. I'm not strangling you to death. I don't even know if I still hold your heart and hands. I really don't know. Is this all my fault? Have I loved you so much that's why this hurts this much?='c

Are you still willing to take another chance? Or have you completely erased me out of your life? Did everything else matter when you thought about leaving me?

If you want to do all of this, then why are you holding me back? Why do you have to keep me searching for the answers? Why do you still want me to run after you? You know very well that I'd do that because you didn't exactly tell me to let go of you.

I know that because the last time that you knew that I would get hurt, you actually shed tears for me. ='c

So why?

What has happened after all these days?='c